Archive for Career Advice

How to Build Your Self-Esteem for Health and Happiness

Just added a new book to my All-Time, Ultimate Reading List titled The 6 Pillars of Self-Esteem by Nathaniel Branden.

I wish I had started reading this book when I was a teenager, and read it every year afterward. Foundational, impactful, truth for health and happiness.

“To trust one’s mind and to know that one is worthy of happiness is the essence of self-esteem.”

The benefit of self-esteem …. “lies not merely in the fact that it allows us to feel better but that it allows us to live better—to respond to challenges and opportunities more resourcefully and more appropriately.”

To live better, to feel worthy of happiness, to be able to respond to life’s curveballs? Sign me up!

What’s more … Branden, a psychotherapist, says:

Self-esteem—high or low—tends to be a generator of self-fulfilling prophecies.

According to Branden, the Six Pillars of Self-Esteem are:

  1. The Practice of Living Consciously
  2. The Practice of Self-Acceptance
  3. The Practice of Self-Responsibility
  4. The Practice of Self-Assertiveness
  5. The Practice of Living Purposefully
  6. The Practice of Personal Integrity

The “Sentence-Completion” and other exercises throughout the book are INCREDIBLE, making this an actionable book, not just something to warm your heart.

I went through one exercise about accepting your feelings as they are (even if you don’t like it) and had an enormous breakthrough in understanding an emotion (anxiety, fear about a situation) I’ve been dealing with deeply and continue to. I came away with a more profound understanding of who I am and what drives me. I won’t be exercising this feeling again without knowing its true depths and roots.

Go get The 6 Pillars of Self-Esteem by Nathaniel Branden … it’s a life-changing resource.

 

Looking Back on 2015

Just wrote this post for WProsper about how I don’t usually take time to look back at what I’ve accomplished, but did today and how good it was for my soul.

Take 15 Minutes to Look Back

 

 

How I Get Rid of Guilt

Been thinking over the last week about guilt and its presence and impact in my life … and in those who I care about, so I wrote a length post on the iThemes blog about How to Deal with Guilt.

Here’s an excerpt of how I determine if something is baseless, useless guilt, or actual guilt:

My Self-Assessment of Right or Misplaced Guilt

In each of those examples I gave, I try to ask myself some key questions to better understand my guilt and determine whether it is legitimate or baseless, including:

  • What am I actually feeling guilty about?
  • Why am I feeling guilty?
  • Did I do everything in my power to do what’s right by myself and others?
  • Did my actions reflect my personal values and beliefs?
  • Did I harm or hurt someone?
  • Does the other person(s) have unrealistic expectations about me and my life?

Then with this honest, sobering self-assessment of my attitude and actions, I ask myself:

  • Should I be on the hook for this?
  • Is it really my responsibility or obligation?
  • Is this something I need to change or make amends for? Or is it merely useless and baseless and I need to move on?

Go read the full post on How to Deal with Guilt here.

Want To Live Your Dreams? Choose Them

I just wrote about a post over on the iThemes blog about living your dreams, after we live one of our lifetime dreams and got to live in Portugal for a month.

In the post, I talk about:

  • How living your dreams is about making good choices consistently
  • How it’s about choices, not sacrifices
  • Why we choose to live our dreams, not someone else’s
  • Why jealousy is envy without the cost

Now, go check out the full post as I unpack these and other takeaways on living your dreams!

Less Options = More Happiness

I wrote a blog post on WordPress Plugins for our Make Money with WordPress focus about how when everything is an option or a choice, everything sucks.